The power was out most of the day here in Costa Rica because our amazing country is changing the power lines to save the monkeys. I took the opportunity to stay outside during the outage until the evening. I did my yoga and meditation under a tree. Not unusual, but I let myself stay longer knowing my computer had limited battery. I had a picnic with just me and the tree. I took a nap, wrote in my journal and did some childish doodling.
This tree has become my amazing friend with wisdom I have been writing for you in my new book “PachaMama Prattle” coming soon. On this day we had a deep conversation about productivity. Even though I have been more at ease the last three years living in nature and following my dharma, I still often feel on edge that I am not “doing” enough.
I read an article this morning stating this month was perfect for balancing “doing” with “being”. I am just about done with the writing portion of the new book but as many of you know, I have over a dozen books and probably 100 blogs I have started and not completed. I like the beginning stage of writing. It feels creative and easy. It feels like “being” to me. But the finishing, ugh, it feels like work. It’s the “doing” that makes me grit my teeth.
I heard the power click back on inside but could not find the motivation to go work. It was gorgeous outside. I never want to leave such beauty.
I said out loud.
“PachaMama bring the rains. I love to write when it’s raining.”
“Then baby only work when it’s raining,” she proclaimed.
“PachaMama then I would not get a lot of work done.”
She said, “Exactly baby. But when you worked, you’d be in love.”
I smiled and laid back down loving this wisdom. But soon my conditioning tried to make me feel ashamed for spending an entire day in ease. I was thinking of the article I’d read earlier about balancing doing with being. Again I spoke out loud hoping for some motivation for doing.
“PachaMama”, I said “please help me find balance between doing and being in my life.”
She said, “honey listen to your self. In your life is the key. You spent more than 40 years doing. Baby you’ve banked enough credits to rest in being.”
I know so many of you are just like me with a history of overdoing. I know most of you have to work to make a living. But I hope you find balance using your entire life’s effort as perspective so you feel confident you’ve done enough. So you can have more moments to just Be in Love.
Juls is the author of THE YEAR OF THE FROG:A Tattletale Fairytale available on Amazon, Kindle, iBooks, Scribd, Kobo, Ciando, Flipkart and more. PachaMama Prattle is coming soon. It’s a collection of letters, stories, poetry and activities for big kids to co-create, meditate and awake.