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I spent a few weeks in Texas loving and reminiscing with my momma while we organized and cleaned my grandmother’s estate. Mind you, my Grandma Love passed over 11 years ago. The house has not been lived in since.
I do not write this to judge any choices, but to relax the heart of those with similar circumstances. I want you to know whatever situation stifles you, if you can relax and let be what has transpired moving forth when your heart says so, everything, and I mean everything makes sense beyond mentality….I just know.
I just know the 11 years it took for my family to let go is the exact time it took to let go. There is nothing I would change. I sat on the floor of my grandparent’s home where 6 kids grew up going through dresser drawers stuck in decades of dust. Eleven years have nothing on the untouched time machine blessing granted me by having a grandmother unable to let go of anything.
Transported through the years, I felt the past like a Clinical Psyche Therapist would, piecing patterns and themes until I understood.
I just know every memory I touched was a blessing to evolve. The work I’ve done on me lent the ability to not judge, but reminisce from a place of love. Even the shocking newspaper article announcing my grandpa Love’s death, which left his young wife alone, was the most beautiful read. Tears fell for the trauma her young heart faced, the life he lived, and the lives they helped create.
The energy of his PTSD from fighting “their” war had a price tag so high half a dozen kids, a dozen grand and great-grand kids more, have dealt with the effects of patriotic lore.
I just know even the hardship his sudden death caused was a beautiful lesson to strengthen our love. You see, the unique thing is that man died before my time. Still, we have a connection only Mystics believe. It’s a connection my Master’s level education did not teach me.
I had to go off the grid, seek unconventional healing, study with Shamans in Peru, move myself to sacred tribal land, and fully stand in my skin proclaiming what I know. I had to do this unconcerned of judgement’s stones, to grasp the power our ancestors hold.
It is no coincidence my grandparent’s had Love as a last name. They are the ones that taught me where to find it. They are the ones that insisted it cannot exist when we judge—judging ourselves beyond any hellish crime, doing and doing until our hearts pay the price.
His heart gave way to the stress of “their” war—killing a young man with more love than patriotism will ever reward. And her life was crippled by the basket of legal drugs the white coats insisted were helping. But their love continues to heal me.
Last year at this time they both came to me. On a blanket in a garden under the warmth of Peruvian sun, a yellow rose of Texas smelled just like their love. I heard him say, “Your love dear is the love you need to feel.” While she whispered “Honey, we are all still right here.”
He said, “Don’t even try to make sense of it with your “educated mind”, just know energy goes on. We are with you all the time.
What matters most is your heart. Your heart, do you hear? Nothing is outside your reach. Stop fighting other people’s wars for peace. Go inside. And there you’ll see, no thing is outside your reach.
Do whatever it takes to feel your love. You’ve not given it all away. What you feel in love is an inside job. It’s your job to love you babe.
There’s not one thing that’s happened that should not have occurred. And not one thing your energy has not helped evolve.
Your very power lies in the shift you internally make. And if it takes a decade or more to let go of what’s left, then that’s the time it takes.”
Eleven years after Nanny’s body expired and 45 after Bud Love’s death, they continue to teach me. Heaven is among us. Make the shift right now. Love yourself like you’re not wishing for another to show you how. Feel your heartbeat knowing, in the name of your own Love, lives peace and perfect timing. ~ Juls ❤
Juls lives in Costa Rica where she finds her inspiration in nature. She is the author of her award-winning memoir, The Year of The Frog, a very adult fairy tale come true about her own journey seeking love.
Her newest book to be published soon, PachaMama Prattle is her most creative endeavor combining her love of nature, meditation, poetry and art.
Find her author works on Amazon under her pen name “Juls Amor”, a name she chose to honor her soul and her Mother’s maiden name “Love”.
Juls writes blogs dedicated to promoting healthy love and peace.
Listen to her podcast on podbean while it is still free.
Watch her LIVE on PeriscopeTV
Find her on Facebook under Juls Amor.